Playsuit Problems

Cleaning out your wardrobe is never a super fun experience, you discover posh frocks that haven't had an outing in months or even years, skirts and dresses in sizes you once were and most likely won't be again and old favourites that are probably too old to be worn in public. Sometimes though you find a piece of clothing that reminds you of one of those crazy funny days. I give you, my Wayne Cooper Jumpsuit. It's green, has a plunging neckline and shorts - all in one.

The problem with the jumpsuit is that you must get nearly naked just to get it on and off, seems fine in theory as you get dressed at home. The day in question I wore the jumpsuit to the movies, it seemed like a safe bet, lots of sitting and watching not too much movement. Except I forgot just how much of a pain a jumpsuit can be, I drank one of those giant movie diet cokes and before long it was half way through and I was doing the wee-wee dance. I couldn't take it, I grabbed my stub and went to the ladies! Sweet relief!

Eek! One slight problem, the jumpsuit was a bit tight, I'd forgotten that Husband had helped me into it that morning as I couldn't get the second arm in by myself. Now I'm struggling in the toilet cubicle, not only am I wearing giant Bridget Jones knickers to control my tummy but also not wearing much of a bra, I'm getting hot and I'm starting to freak out.

What to do...what to do...I can't ring anyone as they're watching the movie and we all made a big deal about turning our phones off. I can't go out there with my jumpsuit around my waist, my big knickers and my remaining arm trying to keep my breasts in the worlds tiniest shittest bra. I am going to have to ask a stranger.

Apparently half naked girls in the cinema toilets is weird and people will not help you. No matter how much you try to explain that you aren't a weirdo but if I could just let go of my breasts and if you could just lift up the sleeve....no?....ok....

FINALLY! MY SALVATION! A lovely young girl who also wears inappropriate clothes bursts in with her girlfriends tipsy drunk and racing for the loos and the mirrors! I grab one and ask for assistance! BOOM! Within moments I am dressed again - hugs all-round and I race back up to my seat.

I slide in and Husband turns to me and whispers "where on Earth have you been?"....where indeed...

#wifelife